Movie Review: Jurassic Park III

Details: More information can be found at https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0163025/

Score: 5/10

Jurassic Park III has one of the stupidest movie premises I’ve ever seen. It exists solely to milk more money from a franchise where the every movie following the first Jurassic Park movie has been mediocre to completely trash.

The premise is so damn stupid that I’m just going to have to spoil it. A wealthy CEO comes to Doctor Grant and convinces him to lead a flyby of one of the island filled with dinosaurs for tourism. Grant agrees and instead of a flyby, they land the plane. Once they realize how stupid a thing they just did, they try to fly away only to crash land again. Turns out the CEO is not rich and he just tricked everyone to come along because his son is stuck on the island for some reason. They now must find the son and escape the island somehow.

It’s all just one big excuse to get yourself into a stupid situation where dinosaurs can attack you. This is one of those types of movies where the characters keep doing incredibly stupid things for no reason. No one’s motivation for doing anything is logical. It’s just one stupid decision after another.

All the characters are idiots, but the mother (played by Tea Leoni) is especially dumb. She is what’s known today as a “Karen.” Just a middle aged, loud, stupid white woman who makes everyone’s lives more difficult every time she opens her mouth. It’s not really the actresses fault. The writing is just so bad. What an annoying character. They’re all annoying characters.

The only decent thing about this movie is the special effects. It’s hard to believe that movie this stupid had such an enormous budget.

Overall, this movie is trash. It’s not worth a watch unless you’re really bored.

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